Starting somewhere.

I could write this article a few different ways.

There's the self-promotion version: If you missed this show then you missed the best thing ever!! And then, there's the honest account:

I have high expectations, always. Playing music, I have the highest expectations of not just myself or the band members but of the sound personnel and the crowd and the people running the venue and every single person involved. It isn't always rational, but it's the way of things and I rarely fight it. Did the first live performance of this new project meet my expectations? Yeah. It was exactly what I thought it would be.

Now, It's been a lot of fun working through these songs and putting them together this last month or so and it's always fun to play these songs, partly because they're new and different from anything I've played before but also because I have the fortune of knowing and being friends with good musicians. We've had fewer full band practices than is reasonable but we all believe in these songs and what they say and where they can go. All those factors, however, do not dissolve the plaque of stress and anxiety that's been sedimenting in my mind leading up to the show.

Here's a tip, bands, for your first show: don't run your own sound.

Unless you have great monitors and a friend who can watch your sound board, focus on playing music, that's it. I am not saying that our sound was bad but it added another layer of responsibility to what we were doing. We were responsible for setting up, sound-checking, not having enough time to soundcheck well and run through songs, and then perform the songs. It's really not that burdensome; it just distracts. If an instrument is too loud, or the vocal blend isn't balanced, it takes you out of the world you're creating, the energy of things. And that is often noticed.

Perhaps music should be as it has been for most of its history -- acoustic (as in no electricity). Perhaps the hunt for a powerful sound introduces a sonic element that is harder to control, convoluting what should be a natural extension of the artist. As much as I hate to boil things down to control, professional musicianship is an art of control that's a whole 'nother article.

The last thing to do, ever in a band, is to blame someone; so I'll blame myself. Shame on you, Jake, for getting so anxious and stressed about something so simple and beautiful. It is a pleasure to play music with friends, a privilege. I hope I never take it for granted. Playing in a band is much more than accurate reproduction of music. Playing in a band is more than an image and a sound. Playing in a band is creating micro-community that shares a vision and a story. Are there parts of the music we need to work on? Yeah. Are there things to celebrate about what we did? For sure. Are we going to blow minds? I believe deeply in this.

P.S. Playing in a band is also about going to La Herradura afterwards and being challenged to drink a 34 oz. Blue Moon that you'll before your 12 oz.-and-22 oz.-drinking rhythm section.